Jakarta Casual

Just had Mabel bending my ear over the latest nonsense to come out from the Football Association of Singapore. Now I know we do have a good titter about what goes on in Malaysia, Indonesia and Thailand but there are times when Singapore just leads the field it ain't fair on the rest. Changi is one example. The (lack of) promotion of football is another.

It's becoming quite the trend in many countries to have a regular season then a play off series at the end. The reason for this is simple. Play offs can generate more cash. It's a format that is used in places like Andorra, Azerbaijan, Belgium and Israel. You know, major powerhouses of football.

Mabel is fuming. And with good reason. We have only just got away from the nonsense of 12 teams playing each other three times. But after expanding the pointless, copycat League Cup now, for next season, they want to have a normal season where the 13 teams, as if an odd number is normal, play each other home and away, the top seven will play off for the SLeague while the bottom six will, umm, fight to avoid a relegation that doesn't exist.

So what we're gonna end up is the same old teams, who couldn't pull a crowd if they paraded naked with a bunch of meerkats, playing each other even more often and asking the punter, who is plainly tiring of seeing the time teams possibly six times a season, plus friendlies, to pay for the privilege.

If this is the best they can come up with to increase interest in the game then we may as well give up now.

Not Mabel though. Oh no. She has been on the phone with some of her cohorts, no names mentioned but I believe Aziz who has a roti stall near Joo Chiat is one person she has spoken to, and they are discussing a breakaway league.

Breathlessly she told  me that she envisioned the likes of Tampines, Geylang, Gombak and Woodlands joining forces with teams from Batam, Bintan, Karimun, Muar, Mersing and Ayer Hitam getting together and making their own league. Ideally she said, she would like at least two more teams to enter and is looking for possibilities.

She says there is no worries about media coverage as the game gets ignored anyway and anyway with high profile sponsors like Aziz being lined up she is sure word of mouth will soon spread.

Among her initiatives are doing away with the League Cup, introducing promotion and relegation with the National Football League, her exact words were that maybe the team that won the Superbowl could play off against the team that came last in the league and they could play the game in the US to cash in on TV rights.

She would also put a sock in the PA system at the games saying it gives her a headache and she concentrate on her jigsaw puzzle at half time.

As Mabel hung up she went off on a final expletive tirade. But to summarise she said that there was a poverty of imagination coming out of Jalan Besar and perhaps it would be for the best if they just concentrated on their day jobs and let someone else take over running football.

Mabel is just like common sense at the FA. Neither exist.

Singapore has a reputation for being innovative. But when it comes to football no one it seems can innovate. Instead they pick up a dog eared football magazine and replicate what other people do and say woo! Look at us...